Archive for the ‘Negativity’ Category

I was raised a Catholic and unwittingly consumed all the usual religious teachings over my formative years, including the most ridiculous of all: ‘turn the other cheek’. For years I think I actually believed that heaven would be attainable if I gave the horrible people I met (between the nice ones that is) the opportunity to be horrible…again.

My Zambian friend once said to me that I had the patience of Job. She was right, I do…or did. Most of my blog readers would know this year has been monumental for me. In January, I was diagnosed with bowel cancer and have spent most of this year fighting through some pretty hard treatment yards. When I look back on the person I was before cancer, and now, a lot has changed.

One of the most significant of these changes is in my tolerance of people who offend, who are rude, who have no self-reflection compass, who are arrogant and thoughtless or those who believe competitiveness and ruthless self advancement (of the materialistic kind) is ok. Just like Gordon Gekko’s “greed is good” creed, ego-based behaviour that seeks to dominate or compensate for an undiagnosed failing within is not excusable or ok.

Post cancer diagnosis and treatment, that good little Catholic girl has finally been erased. There is no more ‘turn the other cheek’ for me these days. Life is too short, and peace of mind and happiness are gifts that should be fiercely protected.

And the Gordon Gekkos of this world? Well let’s just say they can make friends with like minded people. It’s one party I won’t be lining up to attend.

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Tick that lesson off!

Posted: September 22, 2015 in drama, learning, Negativity, patterns
Tags: , , ,

Today I lost track of time. I had my head buried in work, was late going for my afternoon walk and let my thoughts stray to those less than perfect parts of my life. I reacted negatively to someone else’s insecurity and didn’t ‘rise above’ it, and descended back into the old patterns; the ones where I take on other’s stuff.

One of life’s biggest lessons for me is not to carry other people’s energy around on my back, like some sordownloadt of dumb ass mule.

We all have those people in our lives; you know, the ones that leave an impression, and I don’t mean a good impression. My thoughts turn to social media jargon to try and illustrate my point. An impression on Twitter for example, is really just a look at something but it is not engagement or activity. Engagement is when you retweet or share a post. Activity is when you click on a link and follow it through. Some people choose not to engage with a tweet or post. It doesn’t interest them, they don’t want to waste their time, or it’s simply rubbish. Why go there. If only relationships and human interactions were that simple. But they’re not, are they.

More often than not we engage in the drama and get sucked into that vortex of negativity. We waste our precious time and tie ourselves up in knots trying to analyse a problem that’s not really our problem at all. I read a line from one of those Facebook gurus today. Normally, I don’t ‘engage’ in these posts, but today I stopped scrolling. It was about recognising you can’t do the learning for people, they must do that for themselves. And that there comes a time when you just have to bless them and release them. In other words, not carrying around their problems as your own.

So I blessed a few of the more difficult people that came my way today; blessed them, released them and let them go. Then I said a prayer for their highest good, and tried to get back on track myself. I walked in the late afternoon, when the clouds were overcast and grey and before the rain came.

In front of the upcoming total lunar eclipse, it’s not surprising people’s energies are scattered. I’ve got the feeling I’ll be doing a lot more blessing and releasing over the coming days.

My new horror novel “Blood Visions” is available for preorder on Amazon. It’s being published by US based Whiskey Creek Press on 12 November 2015.